Spending endless hours working, struggling, buying the right outfits, attending the hot parties, hob-knobbing with the hip people. Networking, socializing, schmoozing. That was me. In a constant state of “look at me” and hoping to be discovered. Or to discover something. Something that would make a mark, make me known. My name in lights. Fame and fortune. I wanted to make it big. When that did not happen, I began to think out of the box. Instead of ME being big, I just needed one big idea. Something that would make me happy and change everything. Instead, came more shopping, debt, self-helping and self loathing. Years pass. Even more of the same and still no big idea. I spent hours dedicated to figuring out what I could I do to become satisfied and fulfilled, meanwhile finding refuse in buying more. I started to notice how much time my husband and I were spending organizing and cleaning the garage, closets, and shed, or driving around looking for craigslist deals instead of doing things like relaxing (what’s that?) hanging out or having fun. When we were not spending time on our belongings, I would feel guilty unless I was doing something constructive such as researching, studying, working and wracking my brain trying to come up with a master plan. I would not rest until we were on the path to our big dreams. But first we needed to figure out what they were. I felt so muddled and overwhelmed we just ended up shopping more and starting many projects that we would not finish. One evening, my girlfriend Jen mentioned to me that she was into this “tiny house thing” and gave me a gift of this tiny bird house she had painted. She then recommended a documentary about people getting rid of all their belongings and living in a tiny house that you could pull on a trailer. My research began that day and nothing has been the same for me (or my husband!) ever since.
“This was so simple. No big whoop.”
I watched the doc, read a book by “The Minimalists” and started getting rid of my stuff. I had never felt so right about anything in my life. Instead of searching outside for more, I was looking inside for less. I couldn’t move fast enough. With every item that I tossed, I felt more space inside of me that was alive. More room for things I didn’t even know that I wanted. Simple life with meaning. My big idea was hidden under all of my stuff. This was so simple. No big whoop.